How to write an obituary

1. Gather the facts

Full name and any maiden name, age, town, and the dates and places of birth and death. Ask one other family member to check them.

2. Write the announcement

One sentence: name, age, town, and date. Many families also say where they died or that they were with family, if they want to.

3. A short account of their life

Education, work, service, faith or community, and what they loved. A specific detail makes it feel like them.

4. Family

List those who survive them, then those who died before them. Use names exactly as the family wants them printed, and keep the two lists separate.

5. Service and donations

Place, date and time of the service, and where donations can be made in lieu of flowers.

6. Before you send it

Confirm the newspaper's deadline, word limit and price. Check every name and date once more.

Print or online?

Newspapers usually charge for paid death notices and obituaries, often by the line or word, and may need them a day or more before publication; check the paper's deadline and price before you write the long version. Funeral home websites and online memorial pages usually allow a longer piece with photos at little or no cost. Many families write one full version and trim it for print.

How long should it be?

A print notice can be as short as 50 to 150 words: the announcement, family and service details. A full online obituary is often 200 to 500 words, with room for their story. Write the full version first; it's easier to cut than to add.

Common mistakes to avoid

• Misspelled names or wrong dates, so have someone else check every one.
• Leaving someone out of the family list; read it to a close relative before sending.
• Too much detail that could be misused, such as a full date of birth together with a home address; many families leave out the exact birthday and street.
• Only listing achievements. One small, true detail, a habit, a phrase, a place they loved, is what people remember.

A short example

Margaret Ellen Cole, 84, of Dayton, Ohio, died peacefully on October 3 surrounded by her family. A retired school librarian, she spent 30 years helping children find the right book and never stopped recommending them to anyone who'd listen. She is survived by her children, Anne and David, and five grandchildren. A service will be held at 11 a.m. on Saturday at First Methodist Church. In lieu of flowers, the family asks for donations to the Dayton Public Library.

This is an illustrative example, not a real person.